By Kara Lawler from Mothering the Divide

So much can be understood and resolved over a cup of coffee.

We fill our hands too full and by doing so, we sometimes shy away from friendships because we’re just too busy.  If you’re overwhelmed, instead of shutting down, tell your friend how you’re feeling in the words you can find, even if it’s hard.  

Or, if you must shut down (and sometimes, I guess that feels like the only option), tell your friend you just need time alone.  A friend will understand but you need to say the words. 

I’m trying to live an authentic, honest life and it seems like the people all around me are, too.  They say what you put off returns to you?  I’m surrounded by real women or maybe I’m just now noticing the authenticity within them.  And I’m so grateful. 

I’ve been surprised on this part of the journey of mothering, over and over again, because of the mother friends it’s brought me.  We make, keep, maintain, or walk away from friendships so our kids can see how it’s done and so that we can get through the day–hard and beautiful all at once–with our children.  We need one another; we need our girlfriends.  But we need authentic relationships–the ones where we know we’re not alone. 

Friends, just go for coffee.  Work it out with your friend instead of keeping quiet.  It will heal a world of hurt.  And it all starts with us. Imagine if so many opposing groups could just go have a cup of coffee and have an honest and civil conversation….  I believe the world would be a better place. 

Here’s to coffee (and mine is 20 ounces!) and healing and growing. I guess it’s not too late?  I try to be better every day for those kids who were at home while I took a timeout for coffee. 

This week, do me a favor?  Go have a coffee with a friend.  Talk.  Be real with the person you’re sitting with, okay?  Let me know how it goes. 

Mama Meditations: This column is published weekly on Sundays, by Kara Lawler, right here on the Mama Lovejoy blog. Kara also writes on her own blog, Mothering the Divide, about the divide that is mothering our children, our spirits, and the sacred. Come, join Kara’s tribe on Facebook or Twitter. For more information on the Mama Meditations column, please visit the Mama Mediations page. If you enjoyed this article and you’d like to see more from Mama Meditations or from Mama Lovejoy, you can follow Mama Lovejoy on Facebook, or @Mamalovejoy1 on Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram and Periscope.